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In a written statement to Charisma, Tims, 40, said he has been involved in counseling since the affair became public.

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The problem is that guys know a woman’s bluff from a mile away…

and the moment you start bluffing about how much you’re willing to tolerate, he knows you’ll tolerate just about anything. Because if you’re afraid enough to lie about your limits, then it’s pretty likely that you don’t actually have limits you’re willing to enforce. Fear that this guy is the one true love of their life.

Instead, you’re focusing on how YOU feel about it and that YOU don’t like it. You can feel hurt and victimized or you can open your eyes to the bigger picture…

and maybe learn something valuable about your guy in the process (maybe some need that he still needs met).

Some people have voids inside them and they forever try to fill them – with having other people desire them, with sex, with power, with money, etc.

When you can recognize what he “gets” from his behavior and you can truly understand him as a man, you might not take his actions personally anymore.But I can’t think of a time where the insecurity of one partner inspired a change in the other partner.Especially when the insecure partner isn’t willing to walk away regardless of whether or not they get what they want.Do you know what’s at the core of why women put up with behavior they find unacceptable? The reality of it is that if you want to mentally and emotionally be in a place where you have any say in your relationship, you have to diminish your fear of loss.Let me shift your attention to the fact that you this guy.And now, a little over a year into the relationship you’re disappointed that he’s still the same guy… People do this all the time, but it doesn’t make it right or sane.